Well, either I am going through an emotional detox, or I have hormonal issues or something at this point. I have spent the last couple of days in a series of funks. Angry, depressed, lack of confidence, the whole gammit. Yesterday I was mostly just irritable and angry. Today I am depressed. Energy and motivation is at record lows. At work I am very displaced and unfocused (more then usual), and in the afternoon I start to spiral down into a negative quagmire.
I have seriously thought about going off the 100% raw path, but I really want to see what a full 30 days will bring. I know that is not some miraculous number, but it is a good period to get a decent evaluation. If this is just emotional detox, I personally believe it is best to just keep pushing through it.
I am assuming if I had gone to a juice or water fast this detox period I believe I am experiencing might have been more intense, but may have worked its way through a bit quicker. I could go on a juice fast for a few days in this challenge, but right now, I really do not have the energy to tackle another obstacle. Its all I can do to stay raw at this moment. I might change my mind on this in a day or two, but for now, just going to stick to the plan.
There has been a lot of thoughts about my childhood, about present relationships, and even some contact from folks that have helped to bring more things to the surface. Now that they are there, I am trying to figure out exactly what to do with them. I obviously need to let a few issues go, although not sure exactly how to do that. I haven’t really been able to meditate seriously the last few days, very scattered mind. I may try this evening before bed, see if I can work through some of these emotions.
In the meantime, here are the stats for the last two days:
Tuesday Day 16:
- Breakfast – Green Smoothie (Cucumber, spinach, avocado, tomato)
- Snacks – Grapefruit, cacao nibs
- Lunch – Yellow Squash, Orange Pepper, Green Juice (cucumber, spinach, bok choy, celery, lemon, carrots)
- Afternoon snack – Banana, dried apricots
- Dinner – Raw salmon & tuna (leftover from prior night), Coconut water and meat
- Evening snack – Watermelon Juice (made out of the whole rind and meat of the watermelon)
My nutrition totals were as follows:
Calories – 1289
- 48% from Carbohydrates
- 39% from Fat
- 13% from Protein
Weigh in this morning had me at 106lbs, about 1lb up from prior, so 5lbs lost in 16 days (started at 111lbs).
Wednesday Day 17:
- Breakfast – Green Smoothie (Cucumber, spinach, avocado, red pepper)
- Snacks – Grapefruit, watermelon juice (with rind), Coconut meat
- Lunch – Salad (mixed baby greens, cucumber, red pepper, celery, red cabbage, tomato, avocado)
- Afternoon snack – Banana, dried apricots
- Dinner – Green Smoothie (Spinach, baby romaine, pea sprouts, cucumber, tomato, ground flax seeds)
- Evening Snack – the smell of popcorn my husband cooked…..just the smell…sigh
My nutrition totals were as follows:
Calories – 1460
- 54% from Carbohydrates
- 40% from Fat
- 6% from Protein
Weigh in this morning had me at 106lbs, no change from prior day, so 5lbs lost in 17 days (started at 111lbs).
I like the watermelon juice, but its likely full of too much sugar for this stage in my diet. I did not mind the rind juiced in, it was a good level of sweetness overall, but probably going to have to keep this out for the rest of the month.
I added flax to my smoothie tonight, will try and keep that up going forward.
Physically, I have had some issues with digestion again, nothing as bad as the first week, but I am still not working properly. Plus, I am still in the middle of my monthly, which is getting old. Tomorrow will be about 7 days, and this monthly came only about 10-12 days after my last one finished up. I chalk this up to detox based on research, but frankly, its getting old now and likely not helping with my mood or emotional swings.
This was not a positive post, so I will end on this note. I am very happy I have made it a full 17 days now. I have had a lot of obstacles, and this has been a true test of my willpower. I am very proud of how far I have come considering I have not felt stellar over the last two and a half weeks. I think I will make a lot of plans for the weekend so I can stay active and out of the house.
